July 29, 2009

My 14-year-old grandson e-mails me that the one thing he wants to do with his life is skateboard. Having prepared myself well, I didn't say One Word to the contrary. But I've been thinking about this and what my most helpful response should be. (And while we might think our moldy opinions don't count for anything with this generation, I believe they do. I believe they really influence how we count with them.)



Last summer, when I went to New York for the purpose of seeing fine art, I remember thinking longingly of lost years and the better choice I might have following high school--to set out for a charming loft in the City, endless conversations with Frank Stella, Jasper Johns, Helen Frankenthaler, and Robert Rauschenberg, and a lifetime devoted to painting--and what my mother would have said and done in reply. Texas girls in my generation did not even conceptualize such plans, let alone voice them. The choice just wasn't available. At least, not to me.

This past May I went home to a class reunion. I was pleased to meet (again) our star quarterback from the ninth grade, heartthrob of all females in junior high. He's a physician these days and talks about his only regret in life being that he didn't play professional ball. Here he is in a lovely house, surrounded by a beautiful family and all the blessings wealth can provide, and a dreamy look comes into his eyes when he talks about his youth--on the football field. I know he would have been a terrific pro quarterback, just like he is a terrific doctor. But he would be happier today, maybe, and pleased that he did what he wanted to do and not what he should have done.



So I cheered my grandson on. Years from now, I don't want him to watch an Olympic skateboarder and think: "That could have been me if anyone in my family had really listened and respected my passion for skating. I could have been a champion and known the happiness of someone who fulfills his destiny by following his bliss."



Skateboarding, like golf or quarterbacking or problemsolving or painting, is an art, too: It is making something beautiful. I could wish no greater happiness for him than that.



PW